The perils of bars (pubs that is)

So, I like baseball. Big revelation, I know. And as you might know, you being Alison because Shelly probably would not, my beloved indians were in the playoffs. I say were because sadly the evil that is Boston has eliminated them, enough on such sad ponderances....

Anyway, I wanted to go watch them play, ie go to a pub and watch on a screen. So I did a little digging and found a place called 'Cheers' a la tv series from the 80's. And then I found a girl from Cleveland, or rather fate found her for me as she is in the anthro department and from Cleveland, her name is Anita she is very nice fyi.

After negotiating times and locations and sketchy cabs, we finally arrive at Cheers a week ago Tuesday. We pay the cover charge, wtf there is a covercharge i say to myself as I hand over a fiver, and enter the mysterious and poorly lit building. It is not sketchy in the I think we are going to die here kind of way a la five points flower shops. It is however sketchy for the following reasons. 1.) It is an American type of bar, with no americans, as evidenced by the fact Anita and I will be the only people watching the game. I find this odd. 2) There are Brits in their late 30's who have decided that this ridiculas hole in the wall is a great place to dance, there is a dance floor by the way. It plays a lot of american rap, some classics from the 80's and of course, beautiful pop music from the 90's i had thought (and hoped) never to hear again. But hear it I did. They also enjoy consuming alcohol and then taking a lighter and lighting their mouths on fire. Ok, this was only one guy but he did it around 15 times in a period of less than and hour, and that includes the time he almost blinded me with the awkardness of his dancing.

However, the most wonderfully sketchy part of the evening: Moldavians.

That's right there are really people from Moldovia, and I met them, and they were AWKWARD.

Here's the story:

So the game is just starting and Anita pulls out her camera to take a picture, because, you know, we are obsessed. Under the TV which is situated in the corner of the bar sit a group of 4 men, two of who are around 40, one near 30 and another I would say is about 24ish. They get very excited and then take a picture of us after we have 'taken a picture of them'. Two of them then come over to us and find out what we are doing. We attempt, several times to make it clear we are taking a picture of the TV- i do this rather vehemntly because their leather jackets make me feel maybe they are in the mob and i'm going to get in a lot of trouble for that picture- and after around 2 minutes of that, they start telling us about themselves, how they like America, and how nice london is.

Here is what I remember of what one of them, let us call him Marco, though that was not his name but I feel that he acted like a marco.
() Anita or me talking
- indicates me or Anita echoing what the other has just said in an attempt to get them to leave so we can watch the game.
** are thoughts.
[gestures]
anything else is marco.


"You are from America. (Yes. -Yes.). I love America. Where are you from. (Cleveland-Cleveland, that is why we are watchcing the game.[point at screen]). Oh, where is that? (In the middle). Oh. What is the best place in America to go on vacation. (Uh...florida. -Yes, florida.) so why are you here. (To watch the game. [Point at screen again with much movement of hand so as to draw line between TV and hand]) What? (We are students here). Oh, that is good. Where are your boyfriends. (*shit-think of something* They are at Sports Cafe because they watned to watch Rugby. They will be here later. *covertly gets out phone under table and texts friend at sports cafe to ask if he will come to cheers.* Oh. How do you like london. (It is very nice, very busy but very cosmopolitan.) {Side Note: The moldovian liked this word, i think that he had probably had this as a vocab word in english and it had a special meaning for him, because very time i said it, he got very excited.} Yes, it is very cosmopolitan. You can get really good indian food here. If you go to the Indian section, it is just like being in India. (*I doubt he has ever been to India*) [To Anita who is Indian] You should go; you will feel right at home. (*Anita is in my mind as American as they come, and pretty far from the Indians who have just emmigrated to the UK as she dresses as nice as Lauren and will be much more comfortable with me I'm pretty sure than random people from the same country as her ancestors*) So why were you taking a picture of us? (We weren't we were taking a picture of the game. [point at screen again].) What? (The game, we came to watch THE-GAME. [point point].) Oh, you like this. [he points ans is confused]. (We are from that town.) Which town? (Cleveland). There? [points at screen]. (Yes-Yes. *Jesus, Mary and Joseph*) Oh. We thought you take picture of us. (No, we like THE-TEAM.) Oh. My brother is a famous wrestler in Moldovia, he is going to the Olympics. You have wrestling in America, but i think you call it something else. (*WE HAVE WRESTLING IN AMERICA. WE CALL IT WRESTING. YOU ARE POSSIBLE THINKING OF WWE RAW. I AM NOT GOING TO CORRECT YOU. I AM GOING TO SHAKE MY HEAD AND HOPE YOU GO AWAY. YOU MADE ME MISS GRADY SIZEMORE BAT. YOU ARE DEAD TO ME.*) (Uh ha). He is going to become a UK citizen because they want to win a lot of metals in the Olympics in 2012. (Oh, how interesting). He is still deciding what to do. (*maybe you should decide to go away and help your brother find girls somewhere else*) (Yeah, it can be hard to leave your country.) (Yes, we are trying to show him the town so he will like it here. (Oh, that is very nice.) Yes.

Somehow or other he left.

There was more to this, I just can't remember. I'm pretty sure I blocked it out. It was really really, like a 9 on the awkwarmeter, so-so-so awkward.

Bisous,
Eleanor